Better then Bridges & Rubies

When you hear the words “Gold Rush” what come to mind? I mean I am not history major but I know that it involves a whole lot of people picking up their lives and moving them to a place in hopes of striking Gold but at a large violent stampede scale, kind of like 50% off sales at those crazy expensive, a little more reasonable but still expensive at 50% stores.  Either way, when people are seeking something of worth, it’s not usually a slow leisurely stroll, it’s usually a rush, a stampede, a “GET OUT OF THE WAY, WORLD!” - kinda hunt down. In my mind that is what seeking boils down to, relentless, driving desire for something that’s of worth.

 Proverbs 2: 4-6 in regards to wisdom says:

“and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure,  then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God  For the Lord gives wisdom;  from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.”  The picture he paints here is very similar to the one I drew earlier, seeking for treasure, looking for silver. But when it comes to wisdom, when it comes to pressing in, to digging deeper into God’s word, into his presence, tapping in to his wisdom and direction, you don’t see people running, arms flapping trying rushing in. Why is that? I asked myself that yesterday, looking at my own life, often days I am way more excited about anything else then spending time with God. I am more excited about getting my morning drink or seeing a familiar face then I am about being still and spending time with God. So looking at my life I have come up with two possible explanations. 

The first: The bridge analogy: So to give some context there is this bridge in Guelph and it is hands down my favorite place, I have been to it more times than I could possible count and just walking  across it seeing its complexly beautiful wooden structure gives me an inexplicable calm and joy. I can’t explain it but its where I would always go, it used to be fairly far away, I would drive the distance  frequently, just so I can stand on it and watch the beautiful river on either side, and just find a sense of happiness that no other earthly place has provided me. This year, I live steps away from the bridge, and I was beyond excited at first. But now days will go by as I step out of my house look out and see the bridge literally steps away but decided that I don’t have time or that the weather is kinda gross. And then the days I do go on the bridge, I am just so overwhelmed with, “WHY DON’T I DO THIS EVERYDAY.” It’s like I’ve forgotten the beauty that is so easily accessible to me now, like I have taken it for granted because now I don’t have to drive from the other side of Guelph and park.  It’s crazy, but I feel like that’s what we do sometimes with God. It’s like we forget the peace he brings us, the joy the love we feel. We are sitting steps away hurting, anxious or depressed thinking, man I don’t have time for this. BUT YOU DO. Man if someone said to you, “You know what will make you less anxious? or happy? or peaceful? It worked for me , no seriously it’s amazing you gotta try it”  You would be, shaking the answer out of them. But the funny thing is if they gave you this long set of instructions to get some kinda product, you might actually be willing to do that than just SIT STILL and spend time with God. Crazy isn’t it? Kinda blows my mind a little bit. But then we spend time with God and we’re like… WHY DIDN’T I DO THIS EARLIER! Well that’s the Bridge analogy.

The second is the Batman analogy. Rebekah, a wise friend of mine shared this analogy, she quoted the scene from Batman where Alfred is sharing a story about how a bandit had stolen precious stones from the local government but had been throwing them away . Alfred says : “One day I saw a child playing with a ruby the size of a tangerine.” I thought that image was so captivating; a child who in his hands holds something that was worth millions, but to him was just a simple toy, probably not even his favorite, just something he liked picking up from time to time and rolling around.  How many of us over look or underestimate the worth of the word of God, the presence of God, the wisdom God gives us. Proverbs 3:14-15 “Wisdom is worth more than silver; it brings more profit than gold. Wisdom is more precious than rubies; nothing you could want is equal to it.”

 Man, sometimes, we’re just playing with rubies without recognizing their worth. If we know God, not know of God, KNOW God.  We are not Christ's fans because we actually know him, we are his followers.  Therefore, in knowing God we should know His Love, His Grace and His Peace. We should be looking rushing in, seeking to spend time with him. Having the “GET OUT OF THE WAY, WORLD!” kind of attitude and recognizing that we are chasing after something that’s of worth. 

Led not Driven

"Your very driven" one of my friends just said to me. "Nah, I said, I'm just very led" 

 I responded almost immediately but after I said it I really realized how true that really is. I am one of the least motivated people to do anything really, I can stay in bed all day unless I have something pressing enough to get me out of bed. There are days where I will just not eat for hours because I'm too lazy to get up and get food, well until my stomach starts growling at me. But yet people look at my life and what I've accomplished as of late and say "man how did you manage to do all this" The thing is.. I didn't. I would be lying if I tried to take credit for something that is so evidently not mine to take. I couldn't do this, not even if I tried with every ounce of strength could I accomplish half of what I've seen happen in my life lately.

I mean, lets look at Love For The Streets for example ( www.loveforthestreets.org ) check it out if you don't have a clue about what I'm talking about. This is a movement that has continued to spread like rapid fire each week in a way I would have never expected. It started off with a simple vision, a simple wish that God put on my heart, to be friends with the homeless. So I stepped out into the streets of Hamilton with a couple friends, and we decided, Hey, this is something we could do, just come out here every other week with some gift bags. But MAN, it has grown so much bigger then that, and its not stopping. We bring a group of people up from Guelph and Hamilton, just university students with a desire to reach those on the streets, a desire to show them Love, the kind of love that we've been shown. I could go on to explain the lives changed through this movement, and I'm not talking about the lives of those on the streets, but the lives of us students as well! The friends we've made, the stories we've heard and shared, the support of the people in the community, people who pray for us every week and support us financially. Man this thing has grown far past anything me or my two friends ever envisioned it to. My point is this, When God puts something on my heart I follow, and so when the fruit of my obedience grows into something I could never have accomplished myself, I can't take credit for it. God leads me to paths I would never take myself and man am I thankful because there is no way that my life would be where it is without him. 

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. Proverbs 16:9 

The Grace on Dirt

The thing about the Past is that we often never get passed it.

I recall talking to my friend and saying "Satan flings my past in my face like it was a sport" 
But truly I believe it's true. The enemy loves having dirt on you, its like he's running a smear campaign during your election, or posting in tabloids about celebrity gossip. He loves bringing you down, digging up dirt, making you question who you are now. He loves burying you in the faults of your past. But here's the thing about the past, its like compost, its made up of some stuff that's pretty rotten and stinks pretty bad, but put it on a plant and it grows faster and stronger. So our past can make us stronger individuals, it can make us grow and learn from our mistakes if we let it. The thing I always remember is this:  if you are still living in your past, if it's still weighing you down, you really haven't grasped the concept of Grace. Because the truth is I look at my past and to say it was a mess is possibly the understatement of the century, and although I know I'm a different person, I do still have moments that I mess up and I have come to realize
Christ's Grace is sufficient 
For Who I Was
For Who I Am
And For Who I Will Become

and if I remember that, no smear campaign or tabloid is ever going to bring me down, because the fact that the enemy has "dirt" on me proves my life has changed. It points to the growth, the strength that God has shown me everyday leading up until now and all I can do is point back to the Grace that made that change possible.

But he said to me. " My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."                     2 Corinthians 12:9

My Core

A core may often be the least visible part, but it is one of the most influential.
The core of us humans defines who we are. We often would like to think that at our core we are good, but that is not the case, our hearts are sick and often have desires that override us. Our desires ripple out into everything we do and everything we are. 
So I did some self-examination as what was at my core, what was the biggest desire or craving. And truth to be told, It was to be Admired. I used to desire people to admire me for what I looked like, for my talents or skills or future career. I wanted to be admired for all these shallow reasons that frankly were about 2 inches deep. But lately, there has been a rather drastic change. I still seek to be admired, but I also understand that I am,  in fact extremely admired, not only that but also Adored; in fact, Jesus Christ thinks I’m to Die for. No seriously. And that's enough. Also I have decided that if I am to be admired for one thing, I want it to be for the way Christ’s love radiates through me. I want that to be my core. I want Christ's love to ripple out into my thoughts words and actions. I want my greatest desire to be a  desire a deeper love: one inspired by Christ's love for me, one that causes ripples that unmistakably reflects and radiates the love of Christ to all those who know me.  

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. "this is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 
John 15:9-12 

Plans

Who am I to plan out my life,

Who am I to think my plans are better, Then God’s?

I am better off giving Van Gogh painting advice or showing Michael Phelphs how to improve his breast stroke.
God is the Author of life. so I think He can more than handle mine. 

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps . Proverbs 16:9

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways" declares the LORD. Isaiah 55:8

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

So I’m going to trust that the master planner, the creature of every intricate  detail of the universe is going to do a better job planning my life then I could ever dream of doing. 

Sincerely, Your Beloved - 5

Beloved,

Being still has been more of a challenge then I anticipated,

To be completely honest, it is one of the hardest things to do,

To give up control,

To trust,

To wait,

To realize that settling would be a mistake,

One I can’t afford to make right now.

I would rather never find you,

Then settle for less than who you are.

Beloved, I have learned the cost of following your heart,

The heart is deceptive and temperamental.

I have learned that if I want God's will, I must also trust His timing.
for " He has made everything beautiful in its time.." Ecclesiastes 3:11

So I will be still and trust the sovereignty of the most high God

To work things out for the good of those who love him.

Sincerely,

Your Beloved